Can I go back after turning down job interview?

Q: I messed up last month and canceled an interview for a job because I didn't like the commute. (Traffic is the pits.) Now I've done some homework about the firm. I've learned that the work they do is right up my alley, and I've had a change of heart about the loca-tion. I honestly feel that the tradeoff of a satisfying and challenging job would more than make up for the bad traffic.

I feel so stupid. I should have gone to the interview, because I still would have had the option to reject an offer if the distance really bothered me. Now, I want to call the manager back and try to salvage this if possible. When he originally got my resume, the manager was pretty persistent about meeting me and seemed disappointed when I canceled.

A friend of mine said that I should just be honest. But how can I avoid coming across as indecisive? I'm interested in making a commitment. How can I convey this and get an interview again?

NICK'S REPLY: I agree with your friend. Be honest about what happened. But don't be too apologetic or overly defensive. That would make you appear weak and indecisive. It's critical that you speak with the manager directly, not with the personnel office. Here's what you might say:

"After we spoke last, I kept thinking about the distance issue. When I consider all the firms I could work with, yours is the one that motivates me the most. Your business most clearly matches my expertise and my interests. It's well worth a drive to work with the right people. What I'm saying is that I'd like to meet you, if you're still interested in talking. I realize the job may no longer be available, but I'd still like to make your acquaintance, if you can deal with the bit of egg that's on my face."

Those last few words reveal a generous level of humility without embarrassing you. State your case, and then let the manager decide.

THE HEADHUNTER TIP: Get past the credentials.

Many companies will not interview you unless your credentials match the job. But there's a simple way to deal with this overemphasis on credentials. Turn the tables. Call the hiring manager and ask what problem or challenge the manager would want the new hire to handle. Then, show how you'd tackle it successfully. Offer to do this demonstration with other challenges that would be part of the job. "I don't have the one credential you want, but I do have the skills and ability to do the work. If I can't prove this to you in a 20-minute meeting, I will shake your hand and leave with no hard feelings. But I believe I can do the work." Of course, you must be able to deliver. This requires lots of homework. If you're not ready to do the work in advance, then don't apply for the job.

THE HEADHUNTER CHALLENGE

Is "proper" use of language overrated?

New technologies like texting, instant messaging and spell checking allow business to move faster without people having to bother with formal letters, reports and presentations. Not everyone speaks and writes well, but they can be successful anyway if their ideas are good and they work hard. Do you need to worry much about grammar and proper use of language to succeed today?

POLL

1. Getting your hands dirty and getting the job done are more important than using fancy words.

2. As long as you get jobs that don't require you to write a lot, it doesn't matter.

3. People who can't write and speak well limit their careers.

4. Spell checkers and grammar checkers make it unnecessary to waste time learning that stuff.

Read The Headhunter's expert opinion online at www.appealdemocrat.com. Keyword: headhunter

Write to Nick at P.O. Box 600, Lebanon, NJ 08833; or www.asktheheadhunter.com.

COMMENTARY

In the world of business, there's dirty work, dirty deals and even dirty clothing (urgh, you smell — no job offer!). But perhaps the most pervasive "dirty" is dirty talk and dirty language. No, I don't mean bad words. I mean good words that are dragged around until they are unrecognizable. I'm referring to foul usage. Incorrect grammar. Poor spelling. Wrong pronouns when nouns just want to be right.

The business world is built on communication, but the increasing speed of communication technologies does not trump the importance of accuracy. Misuse of language makes a job hunter appear inaccurate, inept and less than stellar. (Who wants to hire anyone less than stellar?) There's a lot of incoherent communication in business, and it is never more evident than during an economic downturn, when employers are willing to pay for only the best talent. Lousy writers and sloppy speakers may permeate the business world, but they do not dominate it.

And heaven help you if your boss plods through the English language with less skill than his staff. The worst is the manager who swears, "It's the quality of your ideas that counts, not the way you say it!" And maybe the worst manager is the principal at my kids' school who told me: "We don't bother with spelling here. Nobody can spell. That's what we have spell checkers for." Schools produce weak communicators who increase the cost of doing business in a time when profit is king.

Every time I've had to rewrite a co-worker's report, or clean up the run-on sentences in a business proposal my boss wrote or apologize to a client when my employee misused some pronouns ("Her and me went to the meeting last week"), I feel like I have to wash my hands because I just cleaned up someone's mess. But mostly, I worry about what it's costing me.

Not sure how important effective use of language is? Get over it. Learn how to use language properly and then practice it. Show you can string together a few words into a sentence. Move on to complete paragraphs that start with a main idea. Put a few paragraphs together to make an argument, a case, a point, a sign of intelligence. Discover subheadings that organize and showcase big ideas and create titles that make people want to do what you want them to do. Because that's what business is about.

The philosopher Wittgenstein said, "The limits of my language mean the limits of my world." (You can look it up: That idea is called linguistic determinism.) Learn to speak with authority and pride because your words determine reality — and your success.

Expand your world now. Get an idea of why language matters every day and get a taste for using it effectively. Take a writing course. Read a book about how to speak properly. Gretchen Hirsch's "Talking Your Way to the Top" is easy to take and it will make you laugh enough to take more.

Then get smarter. Get a good dictionary. Buy a guide to grammar, like the Harbrace College Handbook. Buy a book about how to use English accurately, like Bryan Garner's Dictionary of Modern American Usage. Don't just keep these on the shelf. Rifle through them every day. Use the word tools that let you create the reality you want.

Illiteracy reveals ignorance, and ignorance suggests incompetence. Even when you think no one notices, they do. People won't correct you, but they won't forget that you are uneducated. Stop being defensive and cut out the excuses and rationalizations. Learn how to use words to get what you want in life, in business and in your career.

And if you catch me botching a phrase, misspelling a word or goofing on an adverb, smack me. It helps me write better next time. It helps me avoid appearing illiterate, and it helps me be more successful.