PERCEPTIONS: Solid ground

Up and down. Back and forth. Black and white. Maury and Julie. Opposites attract. They do not mix.

During my first years of marriage, I thought there was something wrong with my wife. As we lay in bed, I would wax on eloquently (I thought) about some new philosophy that had captured my imagination. This ended in one of two ways.

Most often, I would feel her hand go limp in mine. I had put my audience to sleep. If she somehow managed to stick with me to the end of my oration, I would ask her opinion. “What do you think?” The response was maddeningly predictable: “That’s nice.”

“Nice?” That is not what I was fishing for. “Profound!” “Mind blowing!” “Brilliant!” Anything but “nice.”

I have heard relationships like ours described as a kite and a string. I am the kite, blowing in the wind. She is the string, preventing me from sailing off and getting stuck in a tree. Or maybe she is Ben Franklin, holding the string, absorbing the electricity when lightning strikes and releasing it harmlessly into the ground.

It has taken me too long to appreciate what I have. Not the wind beneath my wings but the ground beneath my feet. No one can hold his head in the clouds unless his feet are on a firm foundation. Dreamers abound. Grounded souls are rare.

I write this not to eulogize my wife, though she deserves it. I write this because most of us are in contact with an opposite in some area of our lives. It is easy to despise the tension. Perhaps, like me, you need to appreciate the polarity. Perhaps, like me, you need to bow down and kiss the ground.