DEAR ABBY: I just found out my husband of 18 years has been going to “hook-up” websites. He says he was just looking at the pictures, but I don’t believe him. I have caught him cheating twice in the past, so it’s hard to trust him. 

My problem is, he knows I can’t leave him because I have no job, no skills, no money -- nothing. I went right from my parents’ house to living with him after our wedding. We have six kids and one on the way. He will continue to go to these websites because he knows I am stuck. What should I do?– SOON-TO-BE MOTHER OF SEVEN

DEAR SOON-TO-BE MOTHER OF SEVEN: The first thing you should do is see your doctor and be checked for STDs. If you are well, thank your higher power. If you aren’t, get treatment, get well and talk to a lawyer. Your situation may not be as hopeless as you think. 

Have you any relatives or friends you can stay with when you leave, change your life and become self-supporting? It may require job training and time, but please consider it. 

I doubt your husband will have much time for philandering if he has six kids to take care of by himself in addition to his job. I also doubt that few, if any, women he might be hooking up with would welcome becoming the instant mother of six. And one more thing, from now on, please use birth control.

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DEAR ABBY: I have an acquaintance I see occasionally. He recently told me he is getting married. When I congratulated him, I wanted to ask who the lucky groom is because I have often thought he was gay, but I found out he’s marrying a woman. What’s the appropriate way to ask this question nowadays since all of us can marry, I am happy to say.– PONDERING IN NEVADA

DEAR PONDERING: A subtle way to ask that question would be, “Congratulations! What’s your lucky fiance’s (-ee’s) name?”

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